Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Best Menopause Question Ever

I did not write this. I couldn't dream this one up. :) But it's about the funniest e-mail I've gotten in a long time. So appropriate at this point in my life. It could probably apply to those of you who are just hormonal right now.




Best Menopause Question Ever
Q: How many women with MENOPAUSE does it take to change a light bulb?

Woman's Answer: One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the #&%!* light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CABINET for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle of God, actually find them, 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE FREAKING LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!! BECAUSE NO ONE EVER PICKS UP OR CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT
ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS PLACE! AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON WHO CHANGES THE TOILET PAPER ROLL !! I'm sorry. What was the question?
at

28 comments:

  1. UnknownAugust 27, 2008 at 10:05 PM

    Amen Sister!

    Good one!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Calamity Jane's Cottage, BonnieAugust 27, 2008 at 11:35 PM

    That was GOOD!!!!
    Hugs,
    Bonnie

    ReplyDelete
  3. MamaAugust 28, 2008 at 12:09 AM

    oh, what a giggle! thanks for that one.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Purple PamAugust 28, 2008 at 12:09 AM

    Been there, done that, and probably always will. I don't think we every really get finished with menopause. As long as there are MEN around we will always be in MENopause, bless their little hearts!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Tracy P.August 28, 2008 at 12:10 AM

    That's too funny. I can only blame it on that it's time for the kids to go back to school. They need a break from me!

    I've got a little something for you on my blog. You can play along or just know you're appreciated.

    ReplyDelete
  6. SharonAugust 28, 2008 at 2:56 AM

    Too true! And somedays, this is the "lite" version of the diatribe! Thanks for sharing this gem!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Twisted FencepostAugust 28, 2008 at 6:21 AM

    Gee Whiz, and I though I was the only one with that problem. Tends to get under your skin, don't it?

    ReplyDelete
  8. RaquelAugust 28, 2008 at 7:39 AM

    ROFL!!! Actually, that sounds a bit like my mother . . . . Much love, Raquel XO

    ReplyDelete
  9. Salem StitcherAugust 28, 2008 at 7:54 AM

    Oh boy...my husband is in big trouble. I'm not menopausal yet and I already sound like that.

    ReplyDelete
  10. UnknownAugust 28, 2008 at 8:26 AM

    And here I was thinking no would could possibly understand me!!! LOVE IT! It made me feel more normal!

    ~Marlene~

    ReplyDelete
  11. RueAugust 28, 2008 at 8:42 AM

    Good morning Marlene :)

    Apply that story to when Aunt Flo comes around and that would be me...yikes!

    As far as what would I change... my belly. I had two cesareans. Funny thing... I asked for a body like Marilyn Monroe when I was a skinny mini growing up and he granted me that prayer, only to find out later that my figure would be out of style when I finally got it LOL

    hugs,
    rue

    ReplyDelete
  12. SuzanneAugust 28, 2008 at 8:46 AM

    Oh yeah....that's so true. Remember, there is life AFTER menopause, I promise.

    - Suzanne, the Farmer's Wife

    ReplyDelete
  13. Osage Bluff QuilterAugust 28, 2008 at 9:04 AM

    Sisters of menopause will get those bulbs changed. Too funny of a story.
    Osagebluffquilter

    ReplyDelete
  14. AnonymousAugust 28, 2008 at 11:31 AM

    Ahh...! Hilarious! And SOO true!

    ReplyDelete
  15. ChristineAugust 28, 2008 at 2:15 PM

    Have you been e-mailing my mother? I swear she wrote that. LOL

    ReplyDelete
  16. onlymehereAugust 28, 2008 at 2:37 PM

    I'm still laughing at your post 10 minutes later. I stole it for my blog but I gave your credit with a link back to your blog. Hope you don't mind but this was two funny to keep a secret. I love your blog and I'm glad I found it while looking for sewing blogs today! I quilt also. I'll be back later to finish looking it over. Cindy P.S. I love your UFO list, so unique!

    ReplyDelete
  17. onlymehereAugust 28, 2008 at 2:38 PM

    Make that "too" funny....not "two" funny! LOL!

    ReplyDelete
  18. AnonymousAugust 28, 2008 at 3:20 PM

    That may be the funniest thing I've heard in a very long time!!! Sad part is, I could have written it - word for word!!

    ReplyDelete
  19. TriciaAugust 28, 2008 at 8:58 PM

    That's the truth, nothing to do about menopause. You're funny!

    ReplyDelete
  20. LindaAugust 28, 2008 at 10:30 PM

    lmao!!
    TFF!
    Ty for sharing! <-- printing that out and taping it to the kids bathroom mirror :D LOL!!

    ReplyDelete
  21. KatBouskaAugust 29, 2008 at 12:56 AM

    I'm SO passing this on to my mother...

    ReplyDelete
  22. TeresaAugust 29, 2008 at 6:16 AM

    That was so funny. Thanks for the laugh!

    ReplyDelete
  23. sister sheriAugust 29, 2008 at 9:37 AM

    bless our hormones!

    ReplyDelete
  24. AngieAugust 29, 2008 at 2:26 PM

    ,,,,,,,with which we are all famliar!
    love, Angie, xx

    ReplyDelete
  25. DawnAugust 29, 2008 at 3:11 PM

    Menopause may not have hit just yet for me -- but my husband is ready to 'hole up in the garage' if that joke is anywhere near reality.

    Enjoy your day, Marlene! I truly enjoy mine when I come to 'visit' you.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Linda - Behind My Red DoorAugust 29, 2008 at 9:38 PM

    As I am sitting here dripping in my own hot flash, I am also laughing out loud! Good one! LOL

    Have a wonderful Labor Day Weekend!

    ReplyDelete
  27. AnonymousAugust 31, 2008 at 5:14 PM

    HAHAHAHAH, That was just down right hillarious. Wouldn't it be scarry if our families video taped us when we were on a tirade like this? Just about once a month you can hear me acting just like this...poor family, no forget them, Poor ME! LOL
    Melissa

    ReplyDelete
  28. mollySeptember 2, 2008 at 4:24 PM

    Hilarious!!

    ReplyDelete