Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Do You See What I See?

This past weekend my neighbor, Connie, was working in her garden. Sigh. I can't have a garden this year because we'll be gone all summer on a mission trip so I'm envious. Anyway, as Connie was putting her tools away she caught a glimpse of something strange out of the corner of her eye. On a concrete slab in her yard there were two snakes, wrapped around each other and rolling over and over. Naturally she ran screaming for her husband who declared them to be King Snakes and harmless; in fact, they are more than harmless...they are actually good to have in your yard because they eat poisonous snakes as well as mice. The two snakes were apparently making babies. I am glad I did not see this. Very glad. Extremely glad. But it did made me think about other things I'd rather not see. And in no particular order this is what I decided I'd just as soon not see:

1. Mothers in grocery stores grabbing their kids arms and screaming at them. Kids misbehave. But public humiliation isn't the answer. Take them to the car and tan their behinds if you need to but not in the grocery store.
2. Women in WalMart with little to no clothing on (especially the ones my age who decline to wear undergarments). Not pretty.
3. Anyone talking on a cell phone and adjusting the radio in their car while driving 65 down the highway. Take yourself out if you must but leave the rest of us alone.
4. Three pit bulls running towards me and barking when I'm trying to walk for my cardiac health. They're gonna' cause me to have a heart attack!
5. Anyone smelling of suntan lotion sporting a great tan in May - they've obviously been in the tanning bed prior to running errands when I see them. My husband had Melanoma cancer - skin cancer from being in the sun too much. I want to shake them and say, "Do you know what that's doing to you?"
6. Water running out from under the freezer. Uh Oh.
7. My neighbor two blocks down walking around outside in her nylon nightgown...and nothing else. Yep, she does.
8. Cat prints on my car hood. I don't have a cat.
9. Telemarketers names on my caller ID.
10. Blood on any of my children or grandchildren. Even one drop.
11. A notice that any episode of NCIS is cancelled for a Presidential State of the Union Address. I know what the state of the union is and I don't need him to tell me. I didn't get a cost of living raise on my Social Security because, according to him, my cost of living didn't rise. Except my insurance went up...a lot. Go figure.
12. A "Huge Sale" sign on the window of the local quilt shop....but it ended yesterday. I'm hoping God decides to let me take my quilt stuff with me when He calls me home...any chance you think?

This was actually kind of fun...I might have to have a Part 2 to this post. :) I bet you could think of lots of things you'd just as soon not see too! If you do and you decide to post your own list be sure and let me know...that I do want to see.

17 comments:

  1. This post MADE My day!!! LOLOL I am absolutely 100% in agreement with this!!! Please limit the number of snake references in your future blog post though ewwwwww...LOLOL I am glad this post didn't have pics!!!

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  2. As usual, I loved your post. I love your sense of humor. You make me smile each time.
    be blessed, Michelle

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  3. My number one thing I don't want to see is my horses running unattended down the road at 11 PM. #2 the letter from the insurance company telling me the pittance they offered me #3 My backyard covered with aluminum cans that the wind blew there from the bag they were in by the back yard #4 The scale when I get on it saying 10 more pounds than I thought it should #5 the laudry piled up that I didn't do today. I think that is enough for right now. I would not have wanted to have seen the snakes either. I don't really like snakes too much.

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  4. So funny, but true! Can't wait for part 2!

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  5. Loved the post.. cat prints on the truck and no we don't have a cat either..
    Maggey

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  6. Very thought provoking. I'm going to have to work on one of those lists.

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  7. You do make one ponder. Cute post.

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  8. Great list!! Made me think of a lot myself.

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  9. Yes, do write a Part 2, I love this post. I know where you're coming from, Sistah!

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  10. #2 is a pet hate of mine too. What DO they look like!

    It's illegal over here (England) to use a mobile phone while you're driving but people still manage to get away with it. Strictly speaking, it's actually illegal yo do anything when driving that prevents you from having both hands on the steering wheel - so you better not be caught eating a sandwich either.

    #6 - anything that goes wrong in this house involves water either coming in or trickling out!

    #7 - I'm intrigued! How do you know she isn't wearing anything else?

    #11 - I screech out loud when anything at all is cancelled for SOCCER (it frequently is). We've got a General Election going on here so the words "Party Election Broadcast" are pretty unwelcome too

    Happy Wednesday!
    love, Angie, xx

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  11. Marlene....You are a great lady! I actually agree whole heartedly with everything that you wrote!

    Friends,
    Susannah

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  12. Loved this post! I don't like seeing people in pjs at the store or sweats in a restaurant. What is the world coming To
    I grew up with a Mother who killed all snakes. Then married a man who only killed the poisonous kind. It took a while to get used to leaving those king snakes along but they are really beneficial in the horse barn or on the bluff where my Brother lives with Copperheads and Rattlesnakes all around.
    Bless you,
    Mama Bear

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  13. I laughed out loud and made my husband listen to the first part of your post. Thanks for the best laugh I've had today.

    I would rather not see TV shows and movies about murder. Is that the only subject there is to write about?

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  14. Fun read. I don't think we will care about fabric or anything else when we go to be with the Lord. Be will be to busy being in His presence.

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  15. I liked your list. Your comment about the snakes reminded me about a recent post made by wvtreasures. It was a little different, though. I won't go into the details, but it was a lot worse than making babies, and she had pictures!

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  16. What a wonderful list. Bring on part 2.

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  17. Marlene, you made my day with this one. Be looking for Part 2. LOL

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