Don't let the difficulties of the present moments overshadow the reality of God's promises. God's promises still stand. And God's promises are stronger than our failures.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Best Menopause Question Ever

I did not write this. I couldn't dream this one up. :) But it's about the funniest e-mail I've gotten in a long time. So appropriate at this point in my life. It could probably apply to those of you who are just hormonal right now.




Best Menopause Question Ever
Q: How many women with MENOPAUSE does it take to change a light bulb?

Woman's Answer: One! ONLY ONE!!!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT!! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the #&%!* light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CABINET for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle of God, actually find them, 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!!!!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE FREAKING LIGHT BULBS CAME IN!!! BECAUSE NO ONE EVER PICKS UP OR CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!!!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT
ARE A FOOT DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS PLACE! AND DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON WHO CHANGES THE TOILET PAPER ROLL !! I'm sorry. What was the question?

28 comments:

Milah said...

Amen Sister!

Good one!

Calamity Jane's Cottage, Bonnie said...

That was GOOD!!!!
Hugs,
Bonnie

Janera said...

oh, what a giggle! thanks for that one.

Purple Pam said...

Been there, done that, and probably always will. I don't think we every really get finished with menopause. As long as there are MEN around we will always be in MENopause, bless their little hearts!

Tracy P. said...

That's too funny. I can only blame it on that it's time for the kids to go back to school. They need a break from me!

I've got a little something for you on my blog. You can play along or just know you're appreciated.

Sharon said...

Too true! And somedays, this is the "lite" version of the diatribe! Thanks for sharing this gem!

Twisted Fencepost said...

Gee Whiz, and I though I was the only one with that problem. Tends to get under your skin, don't it?

Raquel said...

ROFL!!! Actually, that sounds a bit like my mother . . . . Much love, Raquel XO

Salem Stitcher said...

Oh boy...my husband is in big trouble. I'm not menopausal yet and I already sound like that.

Living on the Spit said...

And here I was thinking no would could possibly understand me!!! LOVE IT! It made me feel more normal!

~Marlene~

Rue said...

Good morning Marlene :)

Apply that story to when Aunt Flo comes around and that would be me...yikes!

As far as what would I change... my belly. I had two cesareans. Funny thing... I asked for a body like Marilyn Monroe when I was a skinny mini growing up and he granted me that prayer, only to find out later that my figure would be out of style when I finally got it LOL

hugs,
rue

Suzanne said...

Oh yeah....that's so true. Remember, there is life AFTER menopause, I promise.

- Suzanne, the Farmer's Wife

osagebluffquilter said...

Sisters of menopause will get those bulbs changed. Too funny of a story.
Osagebluffquilter

Crazy for Primitive Quilts and Gardens said...

Ahh...! Hilarious! And SOO true!

Christine said...

Have you been e-mailing my mother? I swear she wrote that. LOL

onlymehere said...

I'm still laughing at your post 10 minutes later. I stole it for my blog but I gave your credit with a link back to your blog. Hope you don't mind but this was two funny to keep a secret. I love your blog and I'm glad I found it while looking for sewing blogs today! I quilt also. I'll be back later to finish looking it over. Cindy P.S. I love your UFO list, so unique!

onlymehere said...

Make that "too" funny....not "two" funny! LOL!

Darnelle said...

That may be the funniest thing I've heard in a very long time!!! Sad part is, I could have written it - word for word!!

Tricia said...

That's the truth, nothing to do about menopause. You're funny!

Linda said...

lmao!!
TFF!
Ty for sharing! <-- printing that out and taping it to the kids bathroom mirror :D LOL!!

Mama's Losin' It said...

I'm SO passing this on to my mother...

Teresa said...

That was so funny. Thanks for the laugh!

sister sheri said...

bless our hormones!

Angie said...

,,,,,,,with which we are all famliar!
love, Angie, xx

Dawn said...

Menopause may not have hit just yet for me -- but my husband is ready to 'hole up in the garage' if that joke is anywhere near reality.

Enjoy your day, Marlene! I truly enjoy mine when I come to 'visit' you.

Linda said...

As I am sitting here dripping in my own hot flash, I am also laughing out loud! Good one! LOL

Have a wonderful Labor Day Weekend!

cornbreadandbeansquilting said...

HAHAHAHAH, That was just down right hillarious. Wouldn't it be scarry if our families video taped us when we were on a tirade like this? Just about once a month you can hear me acting just like this...poor family, no forget them, Poor ME! LOL
Melissa

Molly said...

Hilarious!!