Don't let the difficulties of the present moments overshadow the reality of God's promises. God's promises still stand. And God's promises are stronger than our failures.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

This. Is. War.

It’s Wednesday. We have company coming for the 4th celebration. I’m excited. Can’t wait to see everyone – some we only see a couple of times a year. But it’s Wednesday. So I load up my husband and we drive to Little Rock, an hour away, to shop at Sam’s. I shop, shop, shop. I need stuff – toilet paper, cereal, sugar, Tylenol PM, you know – stuff. I buy a Sam’s Apple Pie – huge, enormous, beautiful Apple Pie. If you haven’t tried Sam’s Apple Pie then stop what you’re doing right now and go buy one. You won’t be sorry. I buy Hershey’s Brownie Mix. If you haven’t tried Hershey’s Brownie Mix then stop what you’re doing right now and go buy one. You won’t be sorry. That’s the last time I’m gonna’ say that, promise. We load everything in the car and I say to husband, “Husband, I have to go to WalMart now.” I’m not sure I can describe the look he gave me. I just spent $$$ at Sam’s and I HAVE to go to WalMart to buy more. His reply, the sweet thing, “We have to go home and unload this stuff first because you can’t get any more stuff in this car.” Of course, he said it in a very low voice with his teeth tightly together. But he said it, and that counts. We unload and put away and we’re off to WalMart. Where I buy more stuff. Milk, bread, cheese, orange juice, garbage bags….stuff. We come home, unload and put away.

It’s Thursday. Company coming…..clean, clean, clean, cook, cook, cook. I make a double batch of brownies with pecans. Sinful. But then I think to myself, “Oh no, Son doesn’t like pecans and grandson is allergic to nuts!” So I make another double batch of brownies, plain. I make refrigerator Raisin Bran Muffin Mix and bake a dozen. I put the rest of the mix in the fridge to bake fresh the next couple of mornings. (Great recipe that keeps up to 6 weeks in the fridge and you can bake 1 or 2 or 20 when you want.)

I have stuff sitting everywhere – chips on the washer, bread on the bar, brownies on the cabinet. What to do. I have a brilliant idea! No one uses my front door so I get out a folding table and put it by that door. I cover it with this wonderful antique feed sack quilt top that I found for a bargain price and haven’t quilted yet. Cute, cute, cute. It will be ok because no one will be eating on it, there’s nothing to spill on it, and it will be safe. I load it up – the bread, the chips, the cinnamon rolls/honey buns/cheese Danish, the Apple Pie, both plates of brownies and the muffins. I’m so smart. And cute, don’t forget cute.

It’s Friday. We’re going up the lake today to some friends/family and I want to take a cake. In fact, I’m going to make 2 cakes – Nanny’s Orange Cake. Everyone loves it and they’ll love me for making it! I gather up all the ingredients when I remember those muffins. They start calling me by name and I do need to keep up my strength so I go to my cute, cute, cute table to get one. The whole table is covered with ants. Hundreds of ants. Millions of ants. Gazillions of ants. I scream. I grab a plate of brownies and run to the kitchen and put the brownies down the disposal. My husband grabs the other plate and puts it on the dining table. He starts bringing other stuff to the kitchen while I put that huge, enormous, beautiful Apple Pie down the disposal. I grab the second plate of brownies from the dining table, which is now covered with ants, and put them down the disposal. I yell at my husband to grab the quilt top, the really special I don’t know how old antique quilt top and take it outdoors. He says, “I can’t. It would scatter ants everywhere if I did that.” I finish stuffing everything down the disposal – did I say the brownies, the muffins, the pie all had to go down the disposal? – and head to the living room. Where I see my DH spraying the quilt top with ant spray. Stunned silence. I can’t breathe silence. I can’t move my feet silence. He’s efficient. He’s quick. The quilt top is soaked. He jumps over to the dining table and sprays it, including the red, white and blue Americana Table Runner that I made. Gasp. Before I can move he grabs the quilt top and the table runner, sticks them in the washer with some blue checked sheets I had stuffed in there earlier, adds laundry detergent and turns it on. The washer. Regular detergent. Normal cycle. Red, white, blue, feed sack quilt top. Together.

I’ve never liked ants. Insidious creatures. We’ve fought them in this house ever since we bought it. They want in. I want them gone. We spray and we sprinkle. I keep everything sealed so they can’t possible smell anything and be tempted to come in. Everything on that table was covered tightly with Glad Press ‘N Seal. I shall boycott Glad. And I am declaring War. Ants you better watch out ‘cause I am mad. And I am relentless. And I never forget.


Exuberant Color said...

I feel for you. I have had just a few ants in my kitchen this year and I'm fighting mad about that. I used to be able to buy the syrup, liquid arsenic that you put on a piece of cardboard and that always got them. Haven't seen any of that for years.

Adrienne said...

I would declare war, too! How disappointing.

Thanks for stopping by my blog and for leaving your sweet comments. I thought the song I shared today was appropriate to this holiday weekend. It's a favorite of mine.

mamabug said... showed those ants!!! The greedy little boogers!! But for all your work gone down the disposal I am truly sorry!!! Kathie

Crazy for Primitive Quilts & Gardens said...

Oh NOOO!! I am so sorry for all your hard work and your beautiful quilts..... I hate ants too. We use Ortho liquid spray around the house by the gallon. Again, so SO sorry :o(

Lindah said...

Oh, I am sick! All that beautiful, gorgeous food. All that effort. All that cute! What happened to the quilt and the runner??? I hope they are ok. I hate ants, too. Only roaches do I hate more. Have you tried the boric acid thing?

Christine said...

Wah, ha, ha, ha. Okay, I know it's not funny, but dang that was funny! I'm so sorry for your quilt top though. :(

BTW, I'd love to get that muffin recipe.

Amy L Brooke said...

Thanks for your comment on my Internet Cafe post! I loved the story about the limo! That is a great way to look at it.

Let me know how it goes with the ants. I'm having a problem with those as well and would love to know what works.

Sorry the disposal got all your goodies!

Rebecca Ramsey said...

Oh no! What a battle! And I'm so sorry that your beautiful food became casualties! So sad!

Right now I'm battling fruit flies. They invaded while we were at the beach. My hands hurt from the clapping!

Lora said...

Hi there! So glad you stoppped by my blog! I hope you enjoy the Almond Tea:)
About Lake Fort Smith: if you're familiar with the area then you know they've just reopened it after 10+ years (at least it seems that long). It's totally different and it looks beautiful! We didn't check out the camping area, but I would think it would be nice. Devil's Den State Park also is gorgeous and has some great camping, too (we've actually camped there), and it's also close by. We're from the Van Buren/Fort Smith area, but we moved away a couple of years ago. We do go back often to visit family though. I hope you enjoy your trip!
Oh--and I definitely hope you're winning the ant battle!:)

Southern Lady said...

Marlene, I loved your cute, cute, cute! post about the ants. Bless your heart ... you had a double whammy, having to throw away all that food and having to endure ant spray and a regular wash cycle on your quilt and table runner. How did they come out, by the way?

Hopefully, it will make you feel better to know that I have awarded you the "Arte y Pico" award and you can read about it at "Southern Lagniappe."

I love the way you write and always leave with a smile after visiting you.


Sarah said...

I just found you through Southern mouth is hanging open in shock. I feel for you! How's the feed sack?
I'll look forward to visiting again!

Lelia Chealey said...

Now be careful, they're probably mad too since you put half of their family members down the drain and chopped them up with the disposal! :)
I overheard this woman in WalMart say she puts Wrigley's spearmint gum on her window sills and it keeps them away. The detail I didn't hear was if she unwraps them or justs leaves them in the full pack. Sorry, but I hope you win!!! :)
Thanks for your prayers for my girl!

Ivory Spring said...

Hi Marlene,

I am so sorry to hear about your ant episode. Ants are definitely aggravating creatures. I never like them either.

Thanks for your compliments on my smocking. I like it, but it's very time-consuming and can be repetitive for large areas.

I love your red work too. I have never done that before. I would love to one of these days, and if I do, I know whom I can consult! :)

Meanwhile, happy sewing.

Tracy P. said...

Oh no, that's terrible!! I've got a war on the rabbits in my garden. We've been feeding them horribly expensive rabbit food (in the form of plants that should have become flowers)--but if they came after our FOOD, really YUMMY food, wow, I don't know WHAT I'd do! Curses on the ants!

Purple Pam said...

Yes, what happened with the antique quilt and the table runner? I know what happened to the ants. We have an ongoing battle with them, too. DH sprayed the heck around the house, and they have relocated, at least for a while. there are still a few here and there, bathrooms mostly.

Anonymous said...

My jaw dropped as I kept reading...and I shared your story at the dinner table last night, I couldn't resist...oh my, what a disaster. I feel so bad for you! I'm wondering how the laundry came out...

Molly said...

Oh! I almost wept reading this....All that work. I cannot understand what useful purpose ants serve in this world, or mosquitoes, for that matter. Even if they are God's creatures...What was he thinking? Or, maybe it was day six and He wasn't?
Hope the quilt top and the table runner survived hubby's ministrations.

Anonymous said...

We had ants for the first time ever this spring and I HATE ants. I had put a yellow cake with homemade carmel in the (cold) oven for just a few hours and you would NOT believe how many ants all of a sudden invaded the OVEN. It was like a sci-fiction movie. UGH.

I love my Lock n Lock containers...they will all ants out and hopefully any scent also.

Enjoy your blog.

Dee from Tennessee

Beckynsc said...

I hate it. That you had to throw all those brownies away...and apple pie. Gee Whiz.
Been there. I have fought those ants for 3 years now. Thrown I couldn't tell you how much food away. I finally broke down and paid an exterminator. I haven't seen a LIVE ant for over a week. Keep your fingers crossed.